A thought about how New Yorkers aren’t rude; they’re just in a hurry

“Etiquette in New York is all about time management. In other places, you seem rude if you see someone and don’t talk to them long enough. But here, it’s all about speed. And people are fine with that. It’s like, ‘Hello. It’s nice to see you. Thank you for giving me your kidney. I gotta go.’”
— Amy Poehler

The comedian, writer and actor Amy Poehler wrote those words in 2006 for a New York magazine feature about etiquette. They must have struck a chord, as I used a smaller version for the original Dot Dot Dot back then, and I am, recycling. How virtuous.

Honestly, though, they did strike a chord, because I was struck when in New York City for the first time, several years earlier, how remarkably friendly folks were. Not expansive and overly conversational, but genuinely pleasant. The reputation for rudeness is not deserved.

I recall on one trip that we needed to take the subway to visit Martha’s cousin and his family, who lived way up in Manhattan. It was a holiday, we were downtown, and we weren’t sure which route was best. A helpful man said (and I kid you not) we should take the A train.

He directed us to a platform, and when we saw him minutes later from the other side, he waved back. And then this horrible look came over his face, and he disappeared. Seconds later, he was running up the stairs to our platform, to tell us that he given us the wrong advice. It was a holiday, and the schedule was different. He guided us to where we needed to be. I was always impressed by that.

Poehler’s point, that New Yorkers are often in a ferocious hurry, also rings true. Woe to the person who holds up a wave of people coming out of a subway door!

By the way, everyone should take the A train, at some time or another.